Friday, January 22, 2010
The Haiti Earthquake....
Im sure we all have heard about the haiti situation by now. And to be honest im tired of hearing about it. My heart goes out to every family and person who is either injured or died. Its a sad tragedy but life goes on. Did i donate any money? Yes i did. But to me i feel like people are taking this more important than the hurrican katrina remind you hurricane katrina occured in OUR COUNTRY! People have totally forgot about New Orleans and katrina. We got people going way over there to adopt, pour all their money out , just going all out..And its only a little part of haiti thats destroyed. Im not being selfish but these people didnt really believe in god , there with all that voodoo shit and its totally uncool. Its going to take a while to rebuild Haiti up but each day at a time it will slowly be completed. I was upset that the other people thats in Haiti that havent been affected , isnt helping others out. that dont make any sense. I didnt cry when the situation happened i was just like damnn man and it made me feel bad how things happend so unsuddenly. Pray for Haiti.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
ITS FINALLY HERE!!!! OMARION- OLLUSION
Yessir! This cd is HOT! ive always been an Omarion fan since he first dropped with B2K he has stepped up his game since the break up. I like all the tracks this album is prolly a 8.5 out of 10! I wanted to hit up the album release party but im way in miami :(. Crazy how we have to same name aswell lol. Im just glad hes back on the map!
Monday, January 11, 2010
Updatinq / Ventinq
Yeahh so basically ive forgotten about this , up front and its not that i planned too its just life have been advancing without my permission lol. Ive found myself being more aware of situations and exactly where i stand within myself. Im no stranger to fucking up but i believe that things work out for a reason. Like ive honestly found part of myself in my girlfriend ( WOW i knw right) Where things stand is alright, Im currently in MIAMI!!! =) , Been thinking about getting me a crib here well atleast a appt. ONLY because i spend atleast 48% of my time out here. Well we all know that i have that "idgaf" mentallity and ive always stressed the issue that its hard to find a woman that understands that, and she basically came overnight lol. fkn wonder woman, These past 2 weeks have been so amazing and been an eye-opening for my own sake, Ive never been the "fit-in" type of anything..shes so distant to anything ive ever known in a woman things are just F r e s h. And that i dont mind. Im still stressed, trynna learn so much about myself every 24hrs...
oh hit me on AIM :)
lososobomb888 ( st88888t uppp kidd :)
oh hit me on AIM :)
lososobomb888 ( st88888t uppp kidd :)
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Confused.
Im a big pouter. I want things my way and when things arent im upset.
Ive been basiclly confused for the past 4mnths. This has been the most
off season of my life, usually when shit happends to me im able to bounce back and learn. But for some reason im not being able to connect
to the right things and what i believe in. Im self-centered. ive realized that. I often daze off and picture better things / worse things. Why caint i be happy right now? is it because im NOT in California where my love is? or Im NOT modeling? Im growing into the REAL Cam? i want to shoot myself and at the same time everyone else. My depression gets the best of me and i was never a strong person to take a bunch of feelings in and not let anything come out. The whole inhale,exhale lie is a bunch of BULLSHIT! everytime i do it ...it fails. I have temper tantrums idk how many times a week, my attitude has totally put me in (depression). I tried to cover things up and pat myself nd say "its okay, theres tomorrow" but ill be damned if tomorrow the same shit repeats! (screams) I wnat a vacation w/ the only person i want to fall in-love w/. And mentioning that makes my stomach turns, theres hills in that lovelife, im totally in a different mindset then she is. Lovers are suppose to feel the same right? im speechless..i want to speak up but my mouth is faster then my brain. i say things i dont mean..say things i shouldnt say..do things that i knw is dead wrong from the jump. and i own up to that, yeah so what..you have also! Ive faced the truth about myself. And i want her to see that i care, im human, i can be a damn good man for her and kids, family. I CANNOT and WILL NOT picture myself w/ any other lover. Shes perfect enuff. i feel like im bleeding to death inside slowly, Perfection takes time..and to know yourself is aswell. My 19yrs of living in trial and error has opened my eyes on the world and people , Including myself. People dont understand me, sometimes i dont myself. Im so emotional i love it at times but it break me down too. Only time will tell how i will turn out, how i will increase..learn and abide.
Ive been basiclly confused for the past 4mnths. This has been the most
off season of my life, usually when shit happends to me im able to bounce back and learn. But for some reason im not being able to connect
to the right things and what i believe in. Im self-centered. ive realized that. I often daze off and picture better things / worse things. Why caint i be happy right now? is it because im NOT in California where my love is? or Im NOT modeling? Im growing into the REAL Cam? i want to shoot myself and at the same time everyone else. My depression gets the best of me and i was never a strong person to take a bunch of feelings in and not let anything come out. The whole inhale,exhale lie is a bunch of BULLSHIT! everytime i do it ...it fails. I have temper tantrums idk how many times a week, my attitude has totally put me in (depression). I tried to cover things up and pat myself nd say "its okay, theres tomorrow" but ill be damned if tomorrow the same shit repeats! (screams) I wnat a vacation w/ the only person i want to fall in-love w/. And mentioning that makes my stomach turns, theres hills in that lovelife, im totally in a different mindset then she is. Lovers are suppose to feel the same right? im speechless..i want to speak up but my mouth is faster then my brain. i say things i dont mean..say things i shouldnt say..do things that i knw is dead wrong from the jump. and i own up to that, yeah so what..you have also! Ive faced the truth about myself. And i want her to see that i care, im human, i can be a damn good man for her and kids, family. I CANNOT and WILL NOT picture myself w/ any other lover. Shes perfect enuff. i feel like im bleeding to death inside slowly, Perfection takes time..and to know yourself is aswell. My 19yrs of living in trial and error has opened my eyes on the world and people , Including myself. People dont understand me, sometimes i dont myself. Im so emotional i love it at times but it break me down too. Only time will tell how i will turn out, how i will increase..learn and abide.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Wake-Up CALL ?
MY WAKE YO ASS UP NOTE :
May be difficult to read , but easy as hell for me My girlfriend? told me to write a list out today and i thought it was a good idea for me to expand on and to tackle so after leaving the park i rushed in and wrote down my pro's and con's on my life overall And it works ..a lil . but i still feel the same and im still stuck with the same muthafucking problems!!!! (screams) !. I know i Havent been blogging for a couple of weeks because it reminds me too much of what im going through. But i felt that it was essential tonight. A lot has popped off recently ive had my ups and downs on top of the world type of shit and crash. Well I am currently still in ATL trying to get everything back on track but it feel as if I’ve taken a different itinerary. Everyone has been hammering down on me. I can take pressure and laugh at it because your trying to test me but I haven’t been able to snap back to everyone’s judgment and more so my proceedings. Ive been on some lowkey foul ass shit and I know im wrong. Today 9/20.09 I think ive lost something ive been building on for a min now and it all crashed today. Ive lost a lot of privileges and respect from that person, and fam. Ive cried , had tempers, said my fuck you’s and still feel like shit. Im on the verge of just sticking with being egocentric and not really caring what YOU or ANYbody think or say. I felt when I had that shield it secluded my feelings and emotions. Im a poignant person and if you know me well you are aware of that, im trying to move away from that problem but it is definitely hard. Ive been trying to change for MYSELF and my “significant other” buuut, its not working. What I say would be so hard to believe and the other way around. I think in a couple of months im gonna bear in mind what im facing now and apply it to everyday living, I can write a book on just this situation because it so much to elaborate on. My parents and I connection is declining because of what I choose to do and my attitude which I can understand but my mind-set is my business and I don’t want people trying to change that about me. Me and my brothers are so-so, My bro back in Cali is very suspect to me right now I feel like everything he says to me or do is just a set-up ..like it was before I hate the “what if’s , Maybe’s and the But’s” and everytime I talk to dude those phrases appear. My mom snapped on me earlier and she decided to make me do community service for a while “( ive never done community service or a job in my life. And this is BIG! The only positive thing I can think of is going to the Boys & Girls club giving them positive advice and what to be aware of as you get older and the real world, that makes me happy to help them..but damnnn! Its all just a circle. My lovelife is now blahh, I don’t even think I have one as of now..and that’s a whole different story. Bottom line is ive got a lot of adjusting to do in little time. Shit sucks but I am gonna make things better hopefully soon…till next time. GooodNight.
May be difficult to read , but easy as hell for me My girlfriend? told me to write a list out today and i thought it was a good idea for me to expand on and to tackle so after leaving the park i rushed in and wrote down my pro's and con's on my life overall And it works ..a lil . but i still feel the same and im still stuck with the same muthafucking problems!!!! (screams) !. I know i Havent been blogging for a couple of weeks because it reminds me too much of what im going through. But i felt that it was essential tonight. A lot has popped off recently ive had my ups and downs on top of the world type of shit and crash. Well I am currently still in ATL trying to get everything back on track but it feel as if I’ve taken a different itinerary. Everyone has been hammering down on me. I can take pressure and laugh at it because your trying to test me but I haven’t been able to snap back to everyone’s judgment and more so my proceedings. Ive been on some lowkey foul ass shit and I know im wrong. Today 9/20.09 I think ive lost something ive been building on for a min now and it all crashed today. Ive lost a lot of privileges and respect from that person, and fam. Ive cried , had tempers, said my fuck you’s and still feel like shit. Im on the verge of just sticking with being egocentric and not really caring what YOU or ANYbody think or say. I felt when I had that shield it secluded my feelings and emotions. Im a poignant person and if you know me well you are aware of that, im trying to move away from that problem but it is definitely hard. Ive been trying to change for MYSELF and my “significant other” buuut, its not working. What I say would be so hard to believe and the other way around. I think in a couple of months im gonna bear in mind what im facing now and apply it to everyday living, I can write a book on just this situation because it so much to elaborate on. My parents and I connection is declining because of what I choose to do and my attitude which I can understand but my mind-set is my business and I don’t want people trying to change that about me. Me and my brothers are so-so, My bro back in Cali is very suspect to me right now I feel like everything he says to me or do is just a set-up ..like it was before I hate the “what if’s , Maybe’s and the But’s” and everytime I talk to dude those phrases appear. My mom snapped on me earlier and she decided to make me do community service for a while “( ive never done community service or a job in my life. And this is BIG! The only positive thing I can think of is going to the Boys & Girls club giving them positive advice and what to be aware of as you get older and the real world, that makes me happy to help them..but damnnn! Its all just a circle. My lovelife is now blahh, I don’t even think I have one as of now..and that’s a whole different story. Bottom line is ive got a lot of adjusting to do in little time. Shit sucks but I am gonna make things better hopefully soon…till next time. GooodNight.
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